| | Just found out that my high school class is having a 5-year reunion after all, and SURPRISE, it is tonight (as in about 16 hours from now).
So technically I could still go - it does seem a little like fate that a random LJ friend told us to look her up on Facebook, causing me to log in for the first time in 3 months and see that invitation just in time - but...
I don't know; it seems like not really an official thing so much as the "senior officers" throwing a little event at a place downtown, and it'll probably be just small enough that I will know everybody and feel awkward and embarrassed by the fact that I have been drifting and doing nothing except graduating late from college. Besides, SHE might be there, and the crowd won't be big enough to hide in.
Eh, she probably won't be, but even so. I do not think I'm up to it. They all graduated a year ago, if not sooner from a 2-year degree program or stockpiled PSEO credits, and probably have full-time jobs or are in grad school, and some will be married and for all I know have kids. People I grew up with! I don't need to be slapped in the face with just how hard my life maturity is stuck at age 14.
Frick, I always swore that I would never miss a class reunion, just in case someone else was hoping I'd be there (highly unlikely, but it's the principle of the thing - *I* expect people to show up, so I have to behave in kind) - but here I am, missing the very first one out of sheer embarrassment.
It is not because I don't love you, White Bear! I loved high school and would love to see a lot of you people again! It's just that now I'm even more afraid to talk to you than I was then. And nobody's expecting me anyway, so I'll just...drift on, in my ghostly state of living in past memories - I was just reading 10th & 11th grade journal entries the other day - and pretending none of you have changed at all.
DISCLAIMER: Emo Post has been partially brought to you by the fact that Torchwood has been using my heart as an emotional punching bag nonstop all week, and the finale just completely did me in, so I'm in a slightly unstable/exhausted frame of mind right now.
[Edit: You know what? I've realized that watching the Harper's Island finale with my mom, per our summer-long tradition, sounds like more fun anyway. No regrets! *bounce*]
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| | Posted 7/11/2009 1:45 AM - 1 View - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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